Do We Need Couples Counseling?

If you are wondering, "do we need couples counseling?" ask yourself these questions. Are you in a long-term relationship? Sharing life with someone? Raising a tiny human (or

more) with someone? If you answered "yes" to any of the previous questions, then YES, you likely will be in need of couples counseling at some point in your relationship. Why is this? Relationships are hard work.

Once we pass the initial stages of adoration and infatuation, sharing life with one person for the long haul requires more than just love; it requires knowledge and skills.

In the field of psychology, couples counseling is a specialty. It shares some similarities to individual therapy, but it is different in a lot of ways.

Research shows that couples can sometimes perpetuate spirals of negative blame cycles in their communication when using the following reactions: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. This is also known as the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, because if left unchecked, they will begin to destroy the relationship.

My method of practice is through The Gottman Method for Couples Counseling, a

research- and evidence-based practice designed to strengthen relationships in three primary areas: friendship, conflict management, and creation of shared meaning. Through learning and practicing new patterns of communication, couples tend to grow in understanding of one another, increase positive interactions, improve their friendships, and deepen their emotional connection.

A relationship is much like a flower. It must be watered with love, care, time, and understanding. Although this is common knowledge, it gets difficult to practice at times when responsibilities, demands, or unresolved resentments begin to cascade into relationships, worsening over time if left unaddressed.

Love, respect, trust, and communication are the foundation of any solid relationship. Rest assured there is hope for your relationship. In couples therapy, you and your partner will learn new ways of communicating, relating, and understanding one another. It can help you both create the kind of partnership you long for, when you are equally invested and motivated in making the changes necessary. Most couples, in my experience, are often grateful for the experience and grateful to have learned new skills that set them up for a better trajectory.

Ready to strengthen your relationship and grow together again? If interested, please reach out through my contact form or email me at info@sandyallentherapy.com to get more information about working with me.